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Fanning Files


By Me

The day Mrs. Me and Me will become grandparents is drawing near, and as Two is about to become a first-time mother I am reminded of how Mrs. Me and Me struggled with a new baby.

“Are we doing this right?”

“Is she still breathing?”

“Is she hungry, or does she need her diaper changed?”

All of those things become routine. You learn it and it carries over to the next, and then the next.

It is later in life that parenting becomes a real battle. Because we know all of the things we did wrong, all the mistakes we made growing up, and desperately want to keep our own kids from making the same mistakes we did.

Mother’s Day was a day to be reminded that our kids did appreciate what we tried to teach them... How we supported them in their efforts.

A wise man recently shared a post on Facebook that read - Facebook: a blessing, curse, or both?

The best answer, I think, is “both.”

Some of the best of Facebook is the hundreds of people thanking their moms, whether they are on earth or in heaven, for all they did, and still do, for them.

Still, some who are now in their teens will not realize how right their mother often was, or is, when it seems like she is trying to control their decisions.

As parents, there are difficult decisions to be made when it comes to our children. As much as we try to steer them away from making some of the same mistakes we made we also must accept the fact that we, and they, will sometimes fail.

Someone once wrote, “Good judgment comes from experience. And experience? … well, that comes from poor judgment.”

This, we all eventually learn, is a life-long truth. We never stop learning from mistakes. The best we can hope for as we get older is to learn more quickly, and to not repeat the same mistake too often before we learn from it.

This is how life is. It is a series of moments, strung together to form memories.

Some memories we use to try to teach our children and ourselves. Some are simply to be cherished. All of them become a part of who we are.

Often as parents we have to be the “Bad Guy”. It is good to see, from time to time (like on Mother’s Day), that our children do not hold their childhood against us.

All of these things Two will learn as she becomes a mother. And she will do the best she can.

Someone once said to Me that they didn’t think they did a very good job raising their children.

I replied with this... The only way to be a bad parent is to not be a parent at all.

I don’t know if that’s true, but it sort of goes along with something I heard said a few years ago.

A parent was stressing about the fact that their child was going to be three years old and was not potty trained yet.

A doctor said to them, “I wouldn’t worry too much if I were you. I don’t know of any student in college who is not potty trained yet.”


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